Sunday, January 2, 2011

New Year

Well I had that stomach bug that has been going around for New Year's Eve.. I hope that doesn't mean that I will be sick all of this year too... You know the saying what you do on New Year's Eve is how the next year will be... I hope not!!!!

2010 I had enough sickness for a whole group of people and I don't want to have another bad year... 2008, 2009, and 2010 have well in a nice way of putting it Sucked!!!!! I sure hope that God has better things in store for me in 2011. My hubby did take good care of me last night.  I do have a good Husband not many Men would be able to deal with all that we have dealt with and still be in love with their wife. So I Thank God every day that I have him.

I have done a lot of thinking as for my friends. You really do find out who your friends are when you are down and out. The ones that are always there for you to help pick you up and keep you positive on those days where you really just want to bury your head and hide. I know that life is not suppose to be easy, and that it isn't fair but I still pray for a fair hand in this game called life. I still can't help but think am I that bad of a person... I can't have any children, I can't work due to my messed up leg, I have blood clots and there is nothing they can do about them, nobody can seem to tell me WHY I am this way. Why I am the one who has to deal with hit after hit after hit of bad news and there are other people in the world and who I know that have nothing but good things for them.
They have a great job, healthy, a wonderful family (children), house and etc.... I want those things, I want to have a family, a house of my own, HEALTH so that I could go back to work.... But no I have to struggle my whole life has been that way... I am getting tried of struggling and I am not sure if I can keep on doing it.

I know that I will have to Pray for Strength and I am but I just don't know......